Man Laws Pt 47

41. Men do not buy each other gifts

What about drinks?

thats not a gift thats a drink

But he’s giving it to you, that makes it a gift

that makes it a free drink

42. No man may ever abandon their favorite team regardless of how bad they are

Been a Redskins fan even thru the Pettibon and Spurrier years

I’ve have only been loyal to one team: The Yankees

booooooooooo…do you even watch baseball or do you just like the hat?

Its my home team… I gotta rep the BX.

43. It is acceptable to try your homeboy’s chicks as long as it has been two weeks since they first met. Unless instructed otherwise by your homeboy.

So wait… Two week since they met? Does that mean, if so inclined, you could try to get at her? That’s fucked up.

If he says its cool its cool

That’s still fucked up.

How? If he don’t want her whats the harm?

44. The word “cuddle” should never be used. Instead terms such as “kicked it at the house, chilled out, laid up, hunched, or fucked around” can be used in its place.

Cuddling is very sofT.*

What is cuddling?

You’ve “kicked it at the house” before, don’t act new.

I don’t know what you are talking about. I was feeling you up.

45. Men do not go to the movies together without an equal amount of accompanying females.

You sure this is a law and not a bill? ‘Cause I’ve seen this plenty o’ times.

Its a law. If you go to the movies with your boys they have to sit on the other side of the row or some shit like that. you can’t sit together.

I think this one must be a law like the speed limit is a law.

46. When no women are present, the bar should always be the first seating option at an eating establishment. The second option should be a well lit non-booth table with no candles.

What? Men don’t do ambiance?

ambiance is a set of tiddies and bottles of beer or liquor…and wings


47. A man cannot talk to another man using his sexy voice.

Should a man even have a sexy voice? I mean if your normal speaking voice isn’t sexy, shouldn’t that be okay?

They mean the phone bone voice. You know about the phone bone voice.

I thought that was just how you talk. Now I feel special.

I don’t know what you are talking about

48. A man cannot let a female he’s dating meet his mother unless it’s a serious relationship.


49. A Man cannot spend more than 40% of his time at the gym doing cardio unless he is playing basketball. Dance classes or aerobic class are forbidden.

So I guess those “hip-hop” aerobics are definitely a no…

thats just bullshit in general

You saw the dude from Soul Food teaching hip-hop aerobics in those commercials on MTV. He had folks think they could burn off calories doing the butterfly.

They are all dumb fucks and Soul Food is a shit filled show of depressing skullfuckery

50. The first fuck is what keeps them as long as they put the schwipe down the first time. Head is mandatory and it’s not debatable. Anything else is uncivilized. You get fucks 2 thru 6 depending on how good the first fuck is. Fuck number 7, 8, & 9 is the: “I hope she doesn’t want me to be her boyfriend fuck”. As of fuck 10 she is now regular pussy!

Head is mandatory? Men do realize the whole experience is a gift right? Like a day at the pussy spa… But you can’t just go around demanding services. You should find out what they offer ahead of time. – Why are you even thinking about labels (fucks 7-9) when you should be enjoying pussy? That’s crazy.

Cause some of you start assuming stuff so we have to safeguard ourselves. We start enjoying pussy next thing you know your moms shows up at the house to decorate the bathroom. I’m exaggerating but you get what I’m saying.

Its not a demand of services its saying if you gonna do it, do it don’t half ass. Sex with no head is like eating pizza with no cheese, sauce, or pepperoni. Its like a blunt without the shot of crown. Its just wrong.

I cannot argue. Your logic is superior.

Bow to my greatness



~ by Deviant on May 14, 2008.

2 Responses to “Man Laws Pt 47”

  1. I’m just getting caught up on your list–interesting.

  2. Too funny!! But i see this one in violation alot.
    46. When no women are present, the bar should always be the first seating option at an eating establishment. The second option should be a well lit non-booth table with no candles.

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